As you can see above, I have a fetus. Yesterday was my first real doctor's exam. As of yesterday, I am at 8 weeks and three days. Only 31 weeks and 4 days to go. This is going to take forever.
Things that I learned during this visit are many and varied. First and foremost is that it is very uncomfortable to have your husband in the room while you get a pelvic exam. Second is that my doctor has no sense of humor whatsoever. Like at all. Nothing. She frightens me. She won't be my doctor for the duration of this whole baby adventure though since she doesn't do OB stuff anymore. Just staring at ladyparts all day is fun enough for her I guess. Staring at bajingoes and not thinking anything is funny.
In other news, Nurse Stabby was thankfully absent. The woman who took my blood yesterday kicked Nurse Stabby's arm torturing ass all over the place.
There was no real revelations during the visit. I have a due date now, Dec. 16th, but that's about it. She hasn't forbid me from drinking coffee and anything like that but I did get yelled at for letting people figure out that I am knocked up. Can I help it if everyone I know thinks it's ridiculously strange if I don't drink a beer? Actually, what the hell does that say about me? Why does everyone think I love beer so much? Oh wait, because I do. I love beer. I love beer so much, I would say we are involved. But that is a post for another day. A day when I haven't had a drink in ages and all I want is some hoppy refreshment and then try to strangle Bruce when he won't give it to me.
I have not posted in a while but honestly, there isn't much to say. I am still only vaguely sick on occasion and my first official doctor's exam isn't for a few more days. I suppose I will have more to say after that.
I think once that visit has happened, I will feel more like I am actually pregnant. Right now, this whole situation seems more theoretical than physical. It's like hypothetically, I have a little tiny fetus-like thingy inside me. I know this because someone told me so in a phone call but I have no actually proof of this. They could have at least sent me the test results in the mail or something. I just want something to hold onto. I suppose that is what the first sonogram is for.
As time has passed, I am at 8 weeks now, the secret is slowly creeping out. I had to bring two more conspirators into the fold in order to keep the secret from the group at large. It's like sacrificing a few to save the rest of the world or something. Like that guy in Independence Day who flew his plane into the spaceship to bring it down once and for all. Dr. Jones ended up telling her mother, the Rev. Dr. Jones to cheer her up in a rough time. Finally, Bruce ended up telling two of his friends from hockey because he is getting sick of all the hockey parents asking when he is gonna have a little skater of his own.
Bruce did have the nice idea of telling our moms, doctor permitting of course, on Mother's day. This is an unusually sentimental thought coming from him. It's so sappy, I am shocked that I didn't think of it first. It's not like this will be either mom's first grandchild so it's not like they will lose their minds or anything but I am sure they will be pleased. Or not. I guess we will find out eventually.
