There are some significant changes afoot around here. Despite our most fervent attempts to win the lottery and/or hope that Bruce would have a real job by now (Just kidding, I gave up on that a loooooong time ago), Bruce is still home every day not bringing much money in and Calder is going to day care three times a week which sends a great deal of money out. As such, we have decided to pull Calder out of day care and Bruce will be a stay at home dad for the foreseeable future. Bruce sent the break up email earlier this week and when I read it I totally started crying at work. Because I am a total grown up.
I think the crying was not only the result of being sad for Calder. I mean, he'll have significantly fewer friends to play with and no more Mimi the cook. It wasn't only being sad for my mental health either. After all, Calder won't be able to go off and torture other people for 7 hours a day. What the tears were really about was coming to the full realization about the situation we are in. Bruce and I have never been wealthy. Due to student loans and poor financial decisions in our younger days, Bruce and I have never had a great deal of surplus money but we did OK. We certainly never lacked for anything and could even afford the occasional indulgence. This past summer, when we decided whether to have another child, we acknowledged that money would get tight but we thought we'd manage just fine. Hell, Bruce was so busy with his camps and clinics and other stuff that I wished he's work less and be around more. After all, it's hard to get knocked up when one half of the DNA is in another state. Or country.
Slowly, the extra hockey and engineering-type gigs petered off until a few months ago when all but a few endeavors came to a full stop. Towards the end of last year Bruce found himself sitting at home more weekdays than not. You all remember my panic a few weeks ago about this stuff but that was more theoretical. Now it's real. We have gotten to the point of not being able to afford things that previously presented no problems. It's belt tightening time. Suckily for Calder, fun time at day care is the most obvious first thing to go and we will have to start looking around for other things to cut as Rusty's due date starts bearing down on us. I fear my dearest friends Mssrs. Satellite von TV and DVRington will be the next on this list.
All that said, sometime in March Bruce officially becomes a SAHD. Temporarily, maybe? Yikes. Not that I don't have faith in him, but I feel like he is probably going to need some help. Like, with stuff to do during the day and suggestions for meal times and planning trips and other kids to play with for Calder. I fear that their lives will slowly devolve into hours of watching the Disney Channel and eating an all dinosaur-shaped diet punctuated with daily visits to the thrift store circuit. I am clearly no help here seeing as how a long weekend at home tends to leave me grasping at straws by Monday afternoon. Plus, I'll still be at work all day and I don't want to seem any more like the bossy bitch that I am by leaving out detailed schedules and meal plans for Bruce to follow. That and a day at work tends to leave me catatonic for at least a few hours upon returning home. So, stay at home peoples, how the hell do you do it? Thank you in advance.